ell him some stories; Dreamt of him in Hengshan at that Jade House, I… I… slept on the same bed with him, sharing the same quilt. Mute Granny, I know you can’t hear me, that’s why I’m not shy to talk to you of these things. If I don’t say these things and always keep them in my heart, I’ll go mad. I talk to you of these things, and just lightly call out Big Brother Linghu’s name, then my heart will be at peace for a few days.” She stopped for a time, then lightly called out, “Big Brother Linghu, Big Brother Linghu!” These two cries contained the deep lovesick emotion she felt, Linghu Chong could not help tremble when he heard them. He already knew this little martial sister treated him very nicely, but he never thought she would have such a deep feeling towards him. He thought, “She treats me so passionately, how can Linghu Chong repay this to her in this life?”

Yilin lightly sighed. “Mute Granny, dad doesn’t understand me. Martial Sister Yihe and Yiqing, they also don’t understand me. I thought of Big Brother Linghu, only because I could not forget him. I know this is unseemly. I’ve already entered Buddhism and have become a nun, so how can I think of a man night and day? Moreover, he is our school’s current headmaster. Everyday, I ask for Guanyin to help me, I ask Buddha to help me forget Big Brother Linghu. When I was reading scripture early this morning, I read of the Buddha’s name who helped the people in the world so I asked the Buddha in my heart to protect Big Brother Linghu from harm, to turn trouble to luck, to bless him and young lady Ren to make a blessed match and keep each other company till they’re old, and to be happy for all their life. I suddenly thought, why did I make so many wishes to Buddha? When Buddha hear them, won’t Buddha feel annoyed? So from today onwards, I’ll only pray to Buddha to bless Big Brother Linghu’s life with carefree. He loves to be carefree, with no restraint or control, but hoping that young lady Ren doesn’t control him in the future.” She was quiet for a little while before slowly continuing, “We believe in the Goddess of Mercy who helps the people around the world.”

After reciting more than ten phrases, she raised her head and gazed at the moon, and said, “I must go back, you should go back too.” From inside her bosom, she took out two buns and put them in Linghu Chong’s hand. “Mute Granny, why didn’t you look for me today? Are you sick?” After a time, looking that Linghu Chong was not answering, she spoke to herself, “You also can’t hear, but I keep on asking you. I’m really foolish.” She slowly turned around and went.

Linghu Chong, sitting on the rock, looked at her disappearing into the darkness. Every sentence that she just told him was still flowing around his mind, stirring his heart, making it difficult for him to think and he could not help feeling sentimental. After some time, he incidentally took a glance at the water in the creek and he was startled. He saw that there were two reflections sitting side by side on the rock. He thought it was just a trick his eyes were playing because of the way the water rippled. But after taking another look, there were really two reflections. All of a sudden, his back was covered in cold sweat and his whole body became stiff. How would he dare to turn his head around?

From looking at the reflection on the water, that person was sitting just two feet away behind his back and with only one hit, that person would have been able to take his life. But in his shock, he did not move forward. This person had silently come to his back without him feeling anything. It was very difficult to say how high exactly this person’s martial art was. A thought flashed in his mind, “Ghost!” but thinking of ghost, his heart became even more frightened. After being stupefied for a long time, he took a look at the water again. The creek water was flowing, and under the moonlight, he could not see clearly the reflection on the water. But he saw the two reflections were identical to each other, and both were wearing the wide gowns of women. Even the buns on top of their hair were the same. The other person was just like his own incarnation. Linghu Chong was even more frightened now that even his heart had seemed to skip a beat. Suddenly, without knowing where the courage came from, he abruptly turned his head around to face that ‘ghost’. After looking clearly, he could not help drawing a breath of cold air. He saw a middle aged woman and recognised her to be the deaf and mute servant on that hanging temple. But it was really strange that he was unaware of her arriving behind him. As his fear subsided, his astonishment was not reduced in the slightest bit. He said, “Mute Granny, so… so it’s you, you’ve… you’ve really scared me to death.” But he heard his own voice was trembling and hoarse. He then saw the hairpin on the Mute Granny’s bun, and the light gray gown she was wearing, they were all unexpectedly completely the same as to what he was wearing. He paused for a tick then laughed loudly and said, “Don’t be offended. Young lady Ren remembered really well, she remembered what you were wearing and dressed me up like this. We’re just like twin sisters.”

He saw the wooden expression of Mute Granny. There was not a trace of anger or happiness. He did not know what she was thinking about, so he pondered, “This person is really weird. Since she already saw me disguising as herself, I shouldn’t stay here any longer.” He immediately stood up and folded his hands towards Mute Granny. “The night is late, so I’m going to take my leave.” He turned around towards the road to go away. Just as he walked for only seven to eight steps, he saw the Mute Granny blocking the road in front of him. He did not know how she moved, but she had moved noiselessly without any trace or shadow in front of him. When he was fighting the lightning quick and unbelievably fast Dongfang Bubai, he was still able to see his shape and form. But this Mute Granny was just like she sprouted out of the ground. Even though her movement was not as quick as Dongfang Bubai, her noiseless movement was like that of ghosts.

Linghu Chong was greatly astonished as he knew that tonight he had met a master. He had disguised himself as her without asking for her permission, so of course it was unavoidable that she would be angry. He again saluted her deeply and said, “Granny, I’ve offended you. I’ll immediately change my clothing, then I’ll come to the Hanging Temple to apologise.” That Mute Granny still wore her wooden expression and was not showing the slightest sign of anger on her face.

“Oh, yes!” Linghu Chong exclaimed. “You can’t hear what I’m saying.”

He then stooped down to write on the ground: “I’m sorry, I won’t do it again.” When he stood back up, he saw she was still standing there expressionless without giving a glance at the words written on the ground. Linghu Chong pointed at the words written on the ground and in a loud voice said, “I’m sorry, I won’t do it again!” That Mute Granny didn’t even move a muscle. Linghu Chong bowed to her continuously with his hands folded. At the same time, he was undoing his clothing and his hair. But that granny stayed quiet without saying a single word for the whole time.

Linghu Chong did not know what to do anymore as he scratched his head. “You don’t understand. I don’t know what else to do.” He leaned to one side as he tried to go around that granny. But as soon as his left foot moved, that granny moved slightly to block his way forward. Linghu Chong sucked in a breath and said, “Sorry for the offence!” as he strode to the right and all of a sudden, he stepped back and flew past from the left. Just as his left foot touched the ground, that granny was already in front of him blocking his way forward again. He tried to run away a few more times, and each time, he was getting faster and faster. But that granny kept up with him and blocked his way forward for the whole time. He was now feeling worried.

He extended his left hand out to push at her shoulder. That granny chopped down with her right palm, aiming at his right wrist. Linghu Chong hastily withdrew his hand. He knew that he was at a disadvantage so he didn’t dare to fight with her. The only thing he hoped for was to get away as quickly as possible so he lowered his head to charge at a side of her body. But he had just shaped to move when he suddenly felt the wind from her palm strike. That granny had already sent her palm towards the top of his head.

Linghu Chong quickly dodged by slanting his body to one side. But this palm strike was very quick, and with a clap, his shoulder was hit. That granny also faltered as she hit him. This was because Linghu Chong’s ‘Art of Essence Absorbing’ had reacted in response to the strike and it had actually absorbed the power in that palm strike. That granny hastily extended her left hand in a claw, which was looking thin and sharp, at his eyes.

Linghu Chong was greatly startled, and he quickly lowered his head to avoid it. A moment later, the clothes at his back was ripped. Fortunately, that granny was also afraid of his ‘Art of Essence Absorbing’ so she did not make use of that advantage to hit him. She bent her right arm, and in an uppercut, she again tried to dig his eyes out. It was obvious she had come up with a plan to attack his eyes only. Because no matter how formidable his ‘Art of Essence Absorbing’ was, once her fingers entered his eyes, he would still be blinded. Besides, the soft eyes would also not be able to absorb other people’s internal power. Linghu Chong extended his arm to block the strike. That granny followed it by turning her palm around, and used her five fingers to grab at his left eye. Linghu Chong hastily extended his left hand to block, but that granny’s right hand had flown out to grab at his right ear. He leapt away quickly. Each move was strange and peculiar, and they seemed like the movements that a farm woman might use to fight someone. But these movements were fiercer and faster. In the next few moves, Linghu Chong had been forced to retreat continuously. That granny’s martial art was actually not that high. She was merely able to walk silently and did a sneak attack rapidly. In reality, her martial art was far inferior to Yue Buqun, Zuo Lengchan, and even Yingying’s martial art was much higher than hers. But Linghu Chong’s punching and kicking martial arts were very lacking. If it was not for the fact that the granny was protecting herself from his ‘Art of Essence Absorbing’, and did not dare to clash with his arms and legs, Linghu Chong would have been hit a long time ago.

After a few more moves, Linghu Chong knew it would be hard to escape if he did not draw his sword out. He immediately put his hand inside his bosom to take his short sword out. His right hand had just touched the handle of his sword when that granny executed her lightning quick attacks. In the subsequent seven to eight attacks, Linghu Chong had to block with both of his hands and had no time to draw his sword out. That granny’s attacks were getting fiercer and more violent. There was clearly no enmity or hatred between them, but it was obvious she really wanted to dig his eyes out. Linghu Chong gasped loudly. He used his left palm to cover up both of his eyes, while he again put his right hand into his bosom to take his sword out. Disregarding the hit he took from her palm and kick, he finally managed to grab his short sword.

At this moment, his head was hurting as his hair was grabbed and both his feet were lifted off the ground. The next moment, the sky was revolving and the ground was spinning as his body was being flung around in mid air. That granny had grabbed his hair in order to fling him away. So he was now being spun around quicker and quicker.

“Oi, oi,” Linghu Chong worriedly called out. “What are you doing?”

He flung his arms around trying to grab her arms. Suddenly, his left and right armpits felt numb as the acupoints there were sealed by her. Next, the acupoints on his back, the back of his waist, chest, and neck were all sealed by her. His whole body now felt numb and he was completely immobilized. But that granny still did not stop whirling his body around. Now, Linghu Chong could only hear the whirring sound of the wind and he thought, “I’ve met with countless marvel in my life. But I’ve never been made into a big top for someone to play with before.”

That granny spun him around until he was feeling very dizzy. She finally stopped and let him fall heavily on the ground.

Linghu Chong of course knew there was no enmity between him and that granny. But when at this time she toyed with him until he was half dead, he couldn’t help feeling angry. He scolded, “Stinky granny! You don’t know what’s good for you. If I’d gotten my sword out, you’d have a body full of holes a long time ago!”

That granny looked at him with her cold eyes. Her face remained expressionless, with no trace of happiness or anger at all. Linghu Chong thought, “I can’t beat her. But if I don’t scold her then my loss would be too great. But I’ve been subdued by her now, so if she knows I was scolding her, then she’ll make things difficult for me.”

He immediately thought of an idea to prevent the granny from knowing that he was scolding her. He started giggling and scolded, “Bastard granny, stinky granny, the gods know your heart is bad. That’s why they made you deaf and mute, can’t smile, can’t get angry. You’re just like an idiot. Might as well become a dog or a pig. They might even be better than you.” His scold was becoming more and more malicious, while his face was grinning from ear to ear. At first, his smile was just fake to prevent the granny from knowing that he was scolding her. But at the end, after looking at the granny’s expressionless face, he considered his plan had succeeded so he couldn’t help feeling proud of himself. He was now laughing heartily.

That granny slowly walked up to his side, grabbed his hair, and dragged him along the ground. Her pace gradually became faster. Although Linghu Chong’s acupoints had been sealed, he had not lost consciousness. His whole body was aching from the friction and the collision from the ground. His mouth was continuously scolding, but he could not laugh anymore now.

That granny was dragging him along the path going up the mountain. Linghu Chong took a look at the lay of the land from the corner of his eyes. He saw her turning westward and she was actually going to the Hanging Temple. At this time, Linghu Chong had already guessed that Monk No Commandment, Tian Boguang, Bear Duo of the Northern Desert, Qiu Songnian, and the rest of those people were most likely subdued by her. Besides her, there was no one else who could do those strange and sudden movements, which the gods doesn’t know and the ghosts can’t feel, to suddenly subdue people. But he had once gone to the Hanging Temple and had seen it with his own eyes that this mute and deaf granny had no senses, and could even be said to be slow-witted. Even masters like Great Master Fangzheng, Priest Chongxu, Yingying, and Shangguan Yun did not suspect her when they saw her. This mute granny was really very good in concealing her martial ability.

His thought continued, “If this granny hang me up high on the Gongsun tree at Tong Yuan Valley, then put a paper on me that says I’m the world’s number one pervert, I’d lose a lot of face since I’m acting as the Heng-Shan School’s headmaster and I’m also wearing a woman’s gown. Lucky she’s dragging me to the Hanging Temple instead. I guess it doesn’t matter if she just hangs me here for some time and not out in the open.” Even though he had suffered a bad luck tonight, he was not going to be hung high above the Heng-Shan Other Courtyard, so he still considered it to one lucky thing from this big disaster he was facing. He also thought, “I wonder if she knows my real identity. Would she give me a special treatment if she knows I’m the Headmaster of Heng-Shan?”

Along the road up, his body bumped against countless numbers of rocks causing a lot of injuries. Luckily, his face was facing up so there was no injury to his five senses. When they arrived at the Hanging Temple, that granny dragged him straight up to the highest chamber of the Spirit Turtle pavilion.

“Aiyo, this is bad!” Linghu Chong called out.

Outside the chamber of the Spirit Turtle was the flying bridge, which was looking down at a ten thousand feet deep abyss. He was afraid that granny was going to hang him there. This Hanging Temple was rarely visited by people. If this granny hanged him there, it would be unavoidable that he’d starve to death. This turn of event was far from good.

That granny released him in the middle of the chamber, then she went below. Linghu Chong was lying down on the floor thinking of the background of this despicable granny. He unexpectedly couldn’t think of any clue regarding her origin at all, but he conjectured that she must be a famous senior of the Heng-Shan School, someone like Yu Sao who probably attended people like Dingjing and Dingxian Shi Tai back then. As he thought till here, he felt relieved: “Since I’m the Headmaster of Heng-Shan, whatever anger she has towards me, she won’t give me too much difficulty.” But as he mulled over it, he thought, “I’ve already disguised myself like this. I’m afraid she won’t recognise me. If she thought I was in collusion with Madam Zhang, deliberately dressing up like her and sneaking around in Heng-Shan. She’ll definitely give me something ‘special’, and make me suffer even more. What a disaster.”

He didn’t hear the footsteps going up the stairs as that granny came back up. In her hand was a rope to tie Linghu Chong’s hands and feet. She then took out a piece of yellow paper out of her bosom and stuck it on his neck. Linghu Chong was really curious to see what was written on that paper. But at this time, both of his eyes were blinded as a black cloth was put over them. Linghu Chong was thinking, “This granny is quite smart. She knows I’d want to look at that paper, but she’s not giving me a look.” He also thought, “Linghu Chong is a world’s famous loafer so the words written on that paper must be something awful. I don’t need to see them to know what they are.”

He felt his wrists and ankles tightened as his body soared up high into the air. Now, he was hanging up high from the beam. This fuelled his anger even more and he started hurling abuses. He always loved to play around, but he was actually also very careful. His heart pondered, “I would never be able to escape no matter how much I swear at her. I must slowly move my inner energy to break through the acupoints, and wait till I get my sword then I’ll stop her. Then I’ll hang her up and hang a paper on her neck. Hmm, what should I write on that paper? World’s number one evil granny! Not good calling her world’s number one. She might get happy instead. I’ll write ‘World’s number eighteen evil granny’. Let her rack her brain figuring out who those seventeen evil grannies in front of her are.” He turned his head to a side to listen, but he couldn’t hear any breathing at all. That granny had gone down the chamber.

After hanging up there for two hours, Linghu Chong became hungry and his stomach started growling in protest. But he was secretly happy as he had gradually broken through his blocked acupoints. Suddenly, his body swayed and he fell on the floor with a booming sound. It was that granny who had loosened the ropes tying him up, but he couldn’t perceive at all when she had come back in. That granny pulled open his blindfold. However, he had not broken through the acupoint on his neck so he couldn’t look down to see what was written on that paper. But he could see the last word written on that paper was the character ‘granny’. He quietly called out, “This is bad!” In his heart, he was thinking that this ‘granny’ character she had written must be because she thought he was a woman. If she had written that he was a pervert or a loafer, it did not matter. But to regard him as a woman, then it was a really big concern for him.

He saw that granny took a bowl from the table, and he thought, “Is she giving me soup or water to drink? It’s best if she’s giving me wine!”

All of a sudden, his whole head was warm and he cried out, “Aiyo!” That bowl was filled up with hot water, which was now dripping from his head. Linghu Chong scolded, “Stinking granny, what are you doing?” Linghu Chong was greatly startled when he saw her took out a razor from her bosom. The next moment, he heard scraping sound and his scalp hurt a little. That granny was actually shaving his head.

Linghu Chong was alarmed and angry, he didn’t know what this crazy granny was up to. Not long after, the hair on his whole head was shaved clean and he thought, “Oh well, Linghu Chong will become a monk from today. Aiyo, that’s not right, I’m wearing a woman’s dress so I’m going to become a nun.” His heart suddenly trembled and he thought, “Yingying was joking that I should disguise as a nun. If that prophecy becomes reality, then it’ll be a big disaster. Maybe this evil granny already knows who I am, and she believes that a man becoming Heng-Shan School’s headmaster is very inappropriate. She might not even just shave my head, she might even… even castrate me so I’ll become just like Cannot Have No Commandment. That way I won’t be able to dirty the sacred ground of Buddha. This woman is so insanely loyal to Heng-Shan School, she’s even willing to do anything. Aiyo, today, Linghu Chong has met with a big misfortune. ‘To dominate Wulin, scatter your sword and castrate yourself’, it’s still best if I don’t learn that Evil Resisting Sword Art.”

When that granny finished shaving his head, she swept the hair on the ground. Linghu Chong believed the situation was urgent so he hastily moved his inner energy to fiercely break through his sealed acupoints. He had just felt that a few of his acupoints was loosened when suddenly his back, waist, and shoulder’s acupoints were again sealed by her. Linghu Chong let out a long sigh, and he didn’t even feel like swearing at that granny again.

That granny took down the paper on his neck and put it to the side. Linghu Chong took a look and saw that the words written on that paper were: “World’s number one blind man, not male not female evil granny.” He secretly cried out in misery, “So this granny is pretending to be deaf and mute. She actually heard everything. If not, how could she have known Monk No Commandment calling me world’s number one blind man? She was probably eavesdropping when Monk No Commandment was talking to his daughter, or maybe when Yilin was talking to me. She might even be eavesdropping on both times.” He cried out, “No need to pretend anymore, you’re not deaf.” But that granny was still not paying him any attention as she opened up his gown. Linghu Chong was startled and he called out, “What are you doing?” A ripping sound was heard. That granny had torn apart the female gown he was wearing into two and taken it down.

Linghu Chong called out in alarm, “If you injure a hair on my body, I’ll make mince meat out of you.” Then he thought, “She’s only shaven my whole head, but how can she stop at only that?”

That granny took a small piece of grindstone, wet it, and sharpened her razor. She extended her finger to test out the razor’s edge. Satisfied with its sharpness, she put it aside and took out a porcelain bottle from her bosom. On the bottle was written: ‘Heavenly Connecting Glue’. When Linghu Chong was injured, he had used Heng-Shan School’s medicine countless times. So he recognised the bottle without having to look at the writing on it. He also knew the other medicine called ‘White Cloud Bear Gall Bladder Pill’ which was used to treat internal injuries. Sure enough, that granny took out another porcelain bottle from her bosom and it was the ‘White Cloud Bear Gall Bladder Pill’. That granny then took out some white cloths from inside her bosom, which were actually bandages. Linghu Chong’s old wounds were already healed and he had no other new injuries. The way this granny had arranged everything, it seemed that she was going to make one or two new injuries on his body. He couldn’t help sighing in misery.

Once that granny finished her preparation, she gazed at Linghu Chong. After a while, she lifted his body and put him on top of a table. Her expression was wooden once again. Linghu Chong had undergone many battles, and even when his body got injured heavily or when he was surrounded by powerful enemies, he was never afraid. But at this time, when facing an old granny, he actually felt unspeakable fear in his heart.

That granny slowly picked up the razor. Light glinted off the face of the razor. Linghu Chong’s forehead was covered in cold perspiration which dripped down onto his gown. Suddenly, a thought flashed in his mind, and without thinking he blurted out, “You’re Monk No Commandment’s wife!”

That granny trembled and took a step back. “How — Do — You — Know?” Her voice was dry and grating. She paused after every word, just like a kid who has just learnt to utter his first words.

When Linghu Chong said that, he had not thought of what he was saying. Now that she was asking him, he was asking himself how he knew.

“Hng,” he coldly snorted. “Of course I know. I knew about it a long time ago.” But in his heart, he was thinking quickly, “How did I know? How did I know? Oh, the paper she hanged on Monk No Commandment had the words: ‘World’s number one heartless, perverted and lascivious man’. This ‘heartless’ and ‘perverted and lascivious’ criticism, besides Monk No Commandment, the only other person who would know about it, would be his own wife.” Then he loudly said, “You still care so much for that heartless, perverted, and lascivious man. Otherwise, when he hanged himself, why did you cut off the rope? When he wanted to cut his throat, why did you take away his sabre? With this kind of heartless, perverted, and lascivious man, isn’t it better to just let him die?”

That granny coldly replied, “Let him — Die — So fast? How can — It be — That easy — For him?”

“That’s right,” Linghu Chong replied. “Letting him worried for these last fifteen years. Searching for you from the pass all the way to Tibet, from the northern desert to the western region, searching for you in every single nunnery. But you’re actually hiding here enjoying life, that can be regarded as not easy for him!”

“He — Deserves it,” that granny answered. “He’s already taken me as his wife. Why — Did he flirt with other women?”

“Who said he was flirting?” Linghu Chong inquired. “She was looking at your daughter, and he was looking at her. What’s wrong with that?”

“Once you’re married, looking at other women is not permitted,” the granny retorted.

Linghu Chong felt this woman was very unreasonable, so he argued, “You’re already married, why are you looking at other men?”

“When did I look at other men?” that granny angrily replied. “Nonsense!”

“Aren’t you looking at me now? Am I not a man?” Linghu Chong replied. “Monk No Commandment only looked at some women. But you actually shaved my head off and touched it. Let me tell you, we’re not related but you actually touched my skin, and violated the rules and regulations. Luckily you only touched my head and didn’t touch my face, otherwise, Guanyin will definitely not spare you.” He was thinking this woman rarely went out to the real world so she wouldn’t understand about worldly matters. So he was trying to scare her off to avoid being cut up by her.

“I don’t need to touch you to cut off your arms, legs, and head,” the granny replied.

“Want to behead me. By all means, do as you please.”

That granny coldly laughed. “You want me to kill you? It’s not as easy as that. You now have two choices in front of you, you can choose for yourself. The first choice is for you to quickly take Yilin as your wife and stop breaking her heart. If you don’t agree then I’m going to castrate you and make you become not male not female weirdo. If you don’t take Yilin as your wife, then you can’t marry another shameless and bad woman.” She had been pretending to be deaf and mute for more than ten years already, and had not spoken for a long time. That was why her tongue wasn’t fluid in the beginning, but after talking for some time, her speech was now fluent.

“Yilin is definitely a good lady, but does that make all the other ladies in this world to be a shameless and bad woman?” Linghu Chong inquired.

“Not far off, good is good no matter where they go. So do you agree or not? Quickly say it.”

“Little martial sister Yilin is my good friend. If she finds out you’re forcing me like this, she’ll be angry.”

“She’ll be very happy once you’ve taken her as your wife,” that granny said. “All her anger would be gone.”

“She’s a Buddhist and she’s already sworn not to get married,” Linghu Chong argued. “Once she’s moved by worldly desires, she’ll be blamed by Buddha.”

“If you become a monk, Buddha won’t blame her alone. Do you think I shaved your head for nothing?”

Linghu Chong couldn’t help laughing out loud. “So you shaved my head wanting me to become a monk and take a nun as my wife. Your husband did this before, so you want me to learn from him.”

“That’s right,” she answered.

“There are so many bald headed person in this world, ” Linghu Chong laughingly said. “It doesn’t mean you’re a monk when your head is shaved.”

“That can be easily fixed,” that granny replied. “I’ll just burn some incense marking on your head. A bald head doesn’t mean you’re a monk. But a bald head with some incense marking is definitely a monk.” As she finished talking, she immediately wanted to take action.

“Slow down, slow down,” Linghu Chong hastily interrupted. “To become a monk requires that person’s willingness, how can it be forced